A Satirical look at how the Socialist-Left could try to purchase electoral support when there is no more money in the till and confiscatory taxation will ruin the economy.
The Bronx: In a stunningly brilliant move of fiscal genius, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez propsed a plan to auction off the star of the solar system to fund her vote-buying agenda. “The easiest way to obtain the cash to purchase everyone’s vote would be to sell the Sun to the highest bidder on e-bay”.
In her hastily assembled news conference, Ms. Cortez explained her plan to sell that which provides most of the energy to the planet, not to mention the cause of Climate change. Taxes are already too high, so her solution was to simply auction off that which provides most of the energy to the planet, not to mention the cause of Climate change. Ms. Cortez elaborated further “Let’s face it, when we say the rich should pay their fair share, that really means taking their property and using it to buy votes with free-stuff”.
In a related development, the cost of the National Socialist healthcare scheme has been estimated at $32-Trillion.
When asked how they had the right to auction off a celestial body, she responded that we don’t actually own the property we steal from the taxpayers to use in buying votes, or that we tax a clear, odourless gas that is present everywhere in the galaxy, so why should the Sun be any different?
Her campaign spokesperson Sol explained that the minimum bid will be $20 Trillion dollars and they are only accepting all cash offers. The winning bidder could then take possession and charge anyone using the sun for Light, heat or energy.
Please note that as we mentioned in the subheading, this is SATIRE, as that is the 11th word of the article.